


He Said Goodbye

by jadelikethering



Category: Glee
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-28
Updated: 2014-03-28
Packaged: 2018-01-17 09:02:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1381681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadelikethering/pseuds/jadelikethering
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a short ficlet set four years after Blaine’s senior year in the universe in which klaine becomes engaged and is married between the ages of 19-20. However, like most young marriages, it crumbles early. While coping with a drink in hand, the last person he'd expect joins him at the bar.</p><p>“Chris and I have not been down with it from day one. There’s a difference between shooting for marriage equality and having teenagers get married.” — Darren Criss</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Said Goodbye

“Are you sure that’s such a good idea, kid?” asks the bartender, raising his eyebrows slightly at the curl covered head that rested on the smooth surface of the bar. The man’s fingers drum on the neck of the bottle in his hand as he debates whether or not to cut off the younger drinker yet.

“I don’t think that’s really any of your concern, just fill it,” grumbles the curly haired man before slowly lifting his head up to squint slightly at the bartender, who simply sighs and refills the glass with Scotch. “Just put it on the Anderson-Humm—On the Anderson tab,” he grumbles running a hand through his hair, bulling roughly as his fingers tangled in the messy curls.

Blaine inwardly cures himself for not gelling, but then he remembers that he doesn’t exactly have a reason to anymore. There’s no husband he has to worry about matching up to, and he’s not planning on getting on the dating scene anytime soon. He sighs and reaches out, slowly sliding the freshly filled glass to him before propping his elbows on the edge of the bar. Blaine crosses his arms on the bar and leans forward to rest his chin on his arms as he studies the golden liquid that filled his glass. He tries to keep his mind focused on the liquid rather than the memories that were relentlessly twisting in his stomach and stabbing his heart. The alcohol wasn’t exactly helping the distractions; instead it was making the superficial, distracting thoughts more blurred, thus bringing the painful feelings to the front of his mind.

“Bad break-up?” a voice asks from Blaine’s side as a bar stool screeches against the floor.

Blaine doesn’t lift his head at the words, keeping his eyes on his glass. His eyes are clouded slightly with the thoughts of his past, and the memories drifting through his mind. “Divorce, actually,” he says after a minute, trying to swallow the lump that was beginning to form in his throat.

_“You’re never going to lose me.”_

_“I love you too.”_

_“If that’s an engagement ring, the answer is yes!”_

_“They can’t touch us, or what we have.”_

_“But you’re not going to be alone!”_

_“Yes, we’re gonna be alright. I told you, I’m never saying goodbye to you.”_

The words continue to echo in his mind as Blaine drops his head back onto his arms, shaking it slightly as he tries to push the memories away. They were just un-kept promises, and childish wishes that he should have known would never come true for someone like him. Why would he think that he could actually get that happy ending after everything? He’d never done anything to truly deserve the happiness he always strived for. All he did was run from his problems, and disappoint those he cared the most about. He even disappointed himself, he as of late he’d set a fairly low bar for himself.

“Divorced? Aren’t you a little young to be divorced?” asks the voice again, Blaine still refusing to raise his eyes.

Blaine sighs, tipping his chin up to look at his glass yet again, hoping he’d be able to keep himself in check for a little bit longer.  He didn’t like crying in general, let alone in front of a stranger in a bar. His shoebox apartment that was filled with unpacked boxes of his belongings was waiting for him anyways. When he got home he could take refuge in the seclusion of his own apartment, let the bare white walls wrap around him like a blanket as he tries to lose himself in unconsciousness.

“Thanks for the reminder,” he grumbles before sitting up a little and picking up the glass carefully in his hand. “Look, I know I’m young, but that doesn’t mean I have to explain myself to some complete stranger in a bar,” he says flatly, his jaw clenching slightly as he looks down at the bar counter. “I married too young, and apparently love really isn’t always enough to make it work out…so here I am,” he says, shaking his head slightly before bring his glass to his lips and tilting it back quickly to take a long gulp of the Scotch.

His muscles relax slightly as the heat of the alcohol burns through his veins. A quiet sigh of relief escapes his lips as he slumps forward slightly onto the bar before taking another sip. Blaine had never been fond of the idea of drinking much other than a beer here or there, or a glass of wine at a formal dinner. However, over the past year, when his relationship with Kurt had taken a turn for the worst he couldn’t help but turn to a little liquid courage every now and then.

“Sounds rough, I’m sorry,” says the voice again, causing Blaine to roll his eyes and groan as he allows himself to slump slightly on the bar again.

Pity was never something Blaine had been very good at accepting from others, in fact he refused to accept it. He hated the look in peoples’ eyes when they heard about his bullying prior to transferring to Dalton, or when he had to explain the distance between himself and his father. Blaine hated how people looked at him differently when they heard about his relationship problems, or when they saw the state of his unruly hair and knew it was one of his bad days. He didn’t want people to feel badly for him, he didn’t want people to look at him as if he was an injured puppy. He didn’t want to be handled like fragile china that would crumble to dust from a light flick of a finger.

“Yeah okay, thanks. Really, it means a lot to have a complete strangers pity,” he says sarcastically as he lifts his head off the bar, only to take another drink of his Scotch.

“Hey, claws in Killer, I was just trying to be nice,” says the stranger with a chuckle, causing Blaine to just roll his eyes before tilting his glass back to finish the liquid. The nickname goes completely over his head, and he tries his best to just ignore the stranger at his side as he pushes the glass forward slightly.

“Jared, another please,” he says as he props one elbow on the bar and drops his cheek into his palm.

The bartender glances at Blaine and then at the stranger to his side, raising an eyebrow slightly in the stranger’s direction as if somehow the stranger was the one who would give permission. “I’m cutting you off, kid. You should get home,” Jared says before turning back to the glasses he was cleaning prior to the interruption.

“Come on, I’ve barely had anything tonight!” Blaine objects, leaning forward slightly as he lifts his head from his hand, glaring at the bartender. “You can’t just do that.”

“Sure I can, it’s my bar, and I can do whatever I want. Besides your friend here paid me to cut you off.” Jared replies with a shrug.

Blaine’s eyebrows pull together slightly at the words, unsure of what “friend” the bartender could possibly be talking about. His reeling thoughts are interrupted when there is a hand  on his shoulder.

“Okay Blaine, let’s get you home, alright?” says the voice of the stranger yet again, this time much closer.

Blaine turns around to look at the stranger, his eyebrows raising in surprise when e sees that the man is anything but a stranger. “Sebastian?” he asks in confusion. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m your babysitter, B, come on,” Sebastian says with his usual smirk as he pushes Blaine’s stool slightly to spin the shorter man around. When he sees the lack of amusement on Blaine’s face he sighs and rolls his eyes, “I’m one of the few New York City numbers you have in your phone, so they called me to come get you. They assumed we were friends…and well I couldn’t leave a pretty face like yours out alone on the streets of New York could I?”

Blaine scoffs and rolls his eyes, but jumps off the stool anyways. “Whatever, I don’t care,” he mumbles as he sways slightly on his feet. He ignores the hand’s on his arms that were clearly just to steady him as he pushes past Sebastian toward the door of the bar.

“Thanks for the call,” Sebastian calls over his shoulder to Jared as he quickly grabs his coat off his own stool and follows after Blaine.

Blaine ignores Sebastian as he calls his name repeatedly, and focuses his attention on each step as he quickly tries to walk away from his former admirer. It wasn’t that Blaine hated Sebastian, he just was not in the mood for the sarcasm or innuendos that he knew would not be spared simply because of his recent issues. Kurt was a sore spot that Blaine wasn’t ready to try and heal yet, and the last thing he needed was Sebastian Smythe messing with his head. He knew Sebastian could never understand the feelings he’d had for Kurt, and how hard it was for him to lose him. Love was something Sebastian had made very clear he wasn’t interested in.

“Anderson! Come on, just let me walk you home okay. I promise you’ll never have to see me again,” Sebastian half pleads as he follows at Blaine’s heals as if he is a puppy nipping at it’s owners heels.

With a groan Blaine stops walking and turns around to face Sebastian who almost walks right into him. Blaine crosses his arms over his chest and huffs, “Fine, but don’t talk. Just walk.” Sebastian nods once, pressing his lips together in what Blaine assumes is agreement. Shaking his head slightly, Blaine turns around again and begins down the empty streets yet again, but this time at a much slower pace.

The pair walks in silence, side by side, as they slowly make their way to Blaine’s apartment. Blaine tried to keep his attention focused on the route home, forcing his alcohol-induced thoughts to the back of his mind. He could think about that when he was home, when he was alone. He couldn’t afford to let anyone, let alone Sebastian, see him in that vulnerable place. Blaine presses his lips together, and clenches his jaw as he keeps his eyes forward.

_“You broke your promise you know,” Blaine said quietly as he keeps his eyes on the wooden floor of his new apartment, refusing to look up._

_Kurt was lingering in the doorway, his hands in the pockets of his coat, unsure of what the next move was. “What do you mean?” he asks with a frown, his perfectly groomed eyebrows pulling together slightly._

_“You promised you’d never say goodbye to me,” Blaine says as he slowly brings his eyes back up to Kurt’s, hating how desperate and hurt he must look. He hated how weak he must look._

_It wasn’t Kurt’s fault that they weren’t working anymore, and even Blaine couldn’t blame himself. Sometimes people just grow apart, and there is no one to blame for it. But that didn’t make the pain any easier to deal with, and it didn’t make Blaine feel any more in control. Kurt had always been more in check with his emotions than Blaine was, and for some reason Kurt’s ability to keep himself so put together was driving Blaine crazy. He wanted Kurt’s hair to be a sloppy mess, and for there to be bags under his eyes. He wanted Kurt to be in a plain t-shirt and jeans rather than a perfectly put together ensemble. He wanted the ending of their relationship **, their marriage**  to pay some sort of toll on his ex. Blaine knew it was selfish, unfair, and probably immature to feel that way, but he couldn’t help it. He just hoped that knowing someone else knew how badly he was hurting would make the load a little more bearable._

_However, when the pain of Blaine’s word’s slices in Kurt’s eyes, Blaine realizes it only makes it worse. Because no matter how much he is hurting, he knows that the pain Kurt is feeling is his fault. The fact that his words and his actions, and his mistakes, were causing the look of pain and regret in Kurt’s eyes left a fresh wound in Blaine’s chest._

_“I know…I’m—I’m really sorry Blaine,” Kurt stammers, looking down at his feet, shaking his head slightly. Blaine has to plant his feet in his place to prevent himself from moving to pull Kurt into his arms. He had to stop himself from taking Kurt’s face in his hands and kissing him gently, telling him everything was going to be okay, that they could fix it. Blaine had to stop himself from lying to Kurt, and lying to himself. “I should go…” Kurt says quietly._

“You’re thinking about him aren’t you,” Sebastian’s voice cracks through Blaine’s memory, causing Blaine to jump and stop walking.

Blaine squeezes his eyes shut for a second and ducks his head before he continues walking, shaking his head slightly. “Um…yeah,” he says, deciding against the lie. “Just thinking about things I guess,” he mumbles as he keeps his eyes down.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

“Okay.”

Blaine’s eyebrows raise slightly in surprise when Sebastian agrees not to push the subject,  shooting him a glance before looking back to the ground. He swallows slightly before tilting his chin up to look forward. “Can I…Okay, I just want to say this stuff out loud…and when I do I don’t want commentary,” Blaine says firmly, glancing at Sebastian out of the corner of his eye before looking back down the sidewalk. “Can you do that? You can say…’okay’, but that’s it, okay? No judgments or opinions,” he says raising his eyebrows slightly as he looks back to Sebastian again, “Deal?”

Sebastian raises an eyebrow slightly and shrugs, “Okay…Deal. If this stops you from drinking yourself into a coma, I’ll do whatever it takes.” He looks to Blaine with a small smile, and keeps his eyes focused on the shorter man. His eyes remain unwavering as he prepares himself to listen to whatever Blaine has to say.

Blaine snorts and rolls his eyes, a slight smile on his lips at Sebastian’s words. He slips his hands into his pockets and looks back to the ground. “Okay…I know that it’s partly my fault, that I rushed into it. That maybe if we’d waited until we were older, that maybe we would have been more prepared for everything that comes with marriage…But I’m still just…I don’t get  _why_  we didn’t work out, you know? I don’t get what changed that made everything fall apart. I wish I could just know what I did wrong so I never do that again. Was I too clingy, was I not clingy enough. Did I not say I love you enough? Was I too selfish? Was I gone too much?” Blaine rambles on, shaking his head slightly. “I just don’t know why the fact that we love each other isn’t enough to make us work…because now he’s gone. I’ve lost him completely, and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. I don’t know who I am, or who I even was before Kurt. I’m just…I’m just in tis hole and I can’t find a way out….and I really need to find a way out…but the only person who’s ever been able to give me a hand to pull me out of something like this…well it’s the person I can never go to again,” he says with a frown, his voice cracking slightly as his eyebrows pull together. “I lost my best friend…and I’m never going to be able to get him back. It’s actually over this time…for good. Now I just…I feel alone. I don’t know what to do anymore,” he says as he shakes his head slightly, willing the tears that begin to burn in his eyes to go away.

“Okay,” Sebastian says slightly, his eyes still on Blaine’s face, his eyebrows pulled together slightly as he tries to hold his own words back. “…Can I say one thing? It’s not about him or anything, I swear,” he asks hopefully, raising  his eyebrows slightly.

“…Sure.”

“You’re not alone…I’m here if you need anything. Even if it’s just someone to make sure you don’t get lost on your way home from the bar. Okay?”

“…Okay.”

“Okay.”


End file.
